FOOD FRIDAY: Ain't the beer hot
Indignity Vol. 5, No. 189
REVIEW DEP'T.
Putting Pabst in the Campbell's Is Not a Blue-Ribbon Winner (So Far) FIRST OF A TWO-PART CHUNKVESTIGATION
I ENJOY SOUP, and its close relative, chili, and I am perfectly OK with certain canned versions, and if you do not like canned gloopy-meal foods, move along, nothing to learn here, go scrollin' on down and check out the wacky CELERY SANDWICH recipe, "rub through a coarse sieve!"
Again, if you avoid canned goods, I don't think there's anything about either of these offerings from Campbell's that would compel you to change your mind about pulling back a poptop on one of these products, which I learned about from one of those press release pooper-outer sites (where somebody got a brainwave and came up with "Crack Open a Warm One," urfh!), trumpeting the arrival of the NEW! Campbell's CHUNKY x Pabst Blue Ribbon beer (PBR) collabs, namely, NEW! Campbell's CHUNKY® Pabst® BEEF, BACON & BEER CHILI WITH BEANS and NEW! Campbell's CHUNKY® SOUP THAT EATS LIKE A MEAL® Pabst® BEER CHEESE WITH POTATOES & CHORIZO. Yes, that's quite a mouthful, hiyo.
Beerwise, PBR is one of the classic Lowest Common Denominator beers, not crazy high-alcohol, super "drinkable" when it's hot out and the beer is cold, what they call a Lawnmower Beer, it's wet, it's made out of beer. But I think that if I was gonna add beer to homemade chili, this is the type of beer I'd be looking for, kinda bright.
I cruised my local grocery store and came up dry, so then I checked Walmart dot com, which I figured would be a natural retailer for this product, and I was correct! America! It was already out of stock, so I set a reminder, and about a week ago it popped up at my local.
Let's get to the soup one first! Beer cheese with potatoes and chorizo. On cracking open the can, oof, did not strike me as pleasant, a weird sorta rancid smell? I guess it could be the beer cheese, or maybe the chorizo, or the combo? Anyway, some food doesn't smell great until you cook it, sometimes. And look, it was evocative of rancid, it did not smell officially spoiled or anything, just kinda that odd tang.
Also, visually, not great, it just kinda looked like gravy, there were not any apparent chunks of anything. I had to fish around with my spoon and lift up some potatoes for the photo-op.
I heated it up, and not gonna lie, I heated up for a good long while, just in case, and I tucked in. It wasn't awful, and it was, for me—not a consistently spice-tolerant or spice-enjoying diner—nicely spicy as the top note. The chorizo element was very finely ground, zero chunk, disappointing, and there was kind of a pleasant poblano pepper thing going on along with the odd cheesy tang. The potatoes, again, were the only non-liquidy element, and I wished there were some pieces of pepper or carrot or onion, something. What was kinda educational is they have to break down all the ingredients, so the subset for the beer element includes barley malt, corn syrup, and hops, huh!
I ate this, it wasn't great, will never again let a spoonful darken my soup-hole.
Here are the Nutrition Facts for both of the CHUNKY items, that I copy/pasted from Campbell's dot com and made into a fun info-graphic for the cheese and chili CHUNKY products:
Be sure to check back next FOOD FRIDAY for the thrilling conclusion of our Campbell's CHUNKY® experience: Campbell's CHUNKY® Pabst® BEEF, BACON & BEER CHILI WITH BEANS!
WEATHER REVIEWS
New York City, October 22, 2025
★★★★ The pipes clanged and gurgled. Out the window, bulky figures were moving around in their morning coats. One last pair of shorts laundered and hung on the rack to dry was still faintly damp at the waistband. The body was just starting to acclimate to the newly deepened chill when a gust of wind picked up and kept picking up. But the mostly cloudy forecast gave way to the fact of abundant southern sun. It seemed better to walk around shopping for ingredients for a quick dinner than to go back indoors and cook the slow, already available option.
EASY LISTENING DEP'T.
HERE IS TODAY'S Indignity Morning Podcast!
Tom Scocca
Here is the Indignity Morning Podcast archive!
TOM SCOCCA
ADVICE DEP'T.
HEY! DO YOU like advice columns? They don't happen unless you send in some letters! Surely you have something you want to justify to yourself, or to the world at large. Now is the perfect time to share it with everyone else through The Sophist, the columnist who is not here to correct you, but to tell you why you're right. Direct your questions to The Sophist, at indignity@indignity.net, and get the answers you want.
SANDWICH RECIPES DEP'T.
WE PRESENT INSTRUCTIONS in aid of the assembly of a sandwich selected from C.L.C. Tombola Cook Book, by the Ladies of Cornwall and Friends of the Cornwall Lacrosse Club, published in 1909 and available at archive.org for the delectation of all.
CELERY SANDWICHES.
Take one cupful of white, tender celery chopped fine, mix with it two minced eggs that have been boiled twenty five minutes, then left in cold water until they have cooled to the heart. Chop them fine and rub through a coarse sieve; work up well with the celery and beat in two tablespoonfuls of mayonnaise dressing. Spread between thin slices buttered bread. MRS. W. V. BOYD.
If you decide to prepare and attempt to enjoy a sandwich inspired by this offering, be sure to send a picture to indignity@indignity.net .
SELF-SERVING SELF-PROMOTION DEP'T.
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