Hmm Weekly for July 20, 2021

Two Tuesdays until INDIGNITY!

Hmm Weekly for July 20, 2021

Another Week, Another HMM WEEKLY

GOOD MORNING! This is the latest HMM WEEKLY, successor publication to HMM DAILY, distributed via SUBSTACK, a newsletter delivery and reading platform.

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We encourage you to correspond with us! Email hmmweekly@substack.com. Thank you for reading.

CORRESPONDENCE DEP’T.

IN RESPONSE TO TWO GREAT TASTES THAT TASTE GREAT TOGETHER DEP’T. (Hmm Weekly for July 13, 2021), Jaime Lamond writes:

You nailed it in one; Stewart’s ranges from a decent mini grocery to a terrible convenience store depending on size, age and affluence of the town it’s built in.

My village lost its Stewart’s six years ago; though it was in the lower end of the spectrum of Stewart’s locations you could still go get ice cream (or breakfast sandwiches or hot dogs if you were pressed) and they had benches and tables perpetually held down by older fellas gossiping and drinking coffee.

Tough luck for us that Stewart’s looked at out village (Philmont, population hovering around a thousand, poor, just a little too far from the Taconic for the parkway to be a reliable source of trade) and the state of its existing facility (building needed a total rehab or replacement and the tanks needed replacing) and bailed on us. To their credit, Stewart’s pulled the tanks and gave the building to a local non-profit which turned it into a co-op grocery that’s alternately resented and beloved depending on how much you like spelted rye bread and garlic scapes. Most summers someone takes a shot at running a breakfast and lunch operation out of an old trailer in the parking lot but there were no takers this year.

Our Cumberland Farms renovated and picked up the slack in terms of convenience store food, though they have no ice cream service and no place to sit with your coffee.

As a tiny village we are actually remarkably well served restaurant-wise, with a pub that serves good bar food, a pizza etc. place, a legitimately great farm to table restaurant that draws from far afield and, until the plague year, a small hotel that had a great barroom with table service and nice food. (They’ve converted to full-time, single-group event rentals for now.) These places can draw from further away and thrive on custom from those in the wider area who’d like a night out without driving all the way to Hudson. But for the significant group of our residents who are working poor or on assistance, places like Stewart’s or Cumby’s or the family dollar are lifelines and with few options for what they call third spaces, the loss of that seating at Stewart’s was tough on people. It’s nice to have a place to go sit for a while at the cost of a cup of OK coffee. And standing outside under the overhang at the gas station lacks the dignity of those tatty Formica benches.

The newer nearby Stewart’s locations, in Chatham and Hudson, are much nicer, though the nicest one I’ve been to is in Salt Point, across the road from the Agway I go to to buy chicks every couple of years. Stewart’s is known generally for their milk and especially ice cream. Adirondack Bear Paw is a special favorite and I can recommend it without reservation.

Best regards,
Jaime Lamond.

THOUGHT DEP’T.

Do you have a thought? Send it to hmmweekly@substack.com.

MR. WRONG: The Readers Write

HERE AT THE Mr. Wrong column we don’t get a lot of e-mail, so it’s fun when we do, even if it’s not really e-mail, it’s a tweet, but e-mail isn’t mail anyway, right? Also it wasn’t directly to the Mr. Wrong column, it was directed at the tweet of The Brick House, the umbrella platform responsible—and very soon soon, completely responsible—for inflicting the Mr. Wrong column upon the Internet.

Anyway! In response to the recent Mr. Wrong column MR. WRONG: Check Please, Gentle Reader Janice “Get Vaccinated” a/k/a @bellwetherevent tweeted that checks are good because that helps a small business save a percentage of whatever they would get from you if you sent them a Paypal from your Venmo or whatever, so there, Checks are good, in this one aspect, but I still do not like having to pay money to buy checks to pay people.

Anyway again, thank you “Get Vaccinated,” for tweeting in the general direction of the Mr. Wrong column!

You are encouraged to e-mail the Mr. Wrong column! wrongcolumn@gmail.com.

VISUAL CONSCIOUSNESS DEP’T.

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ADVICE DEP’T.

THE SOPHIST is here to tell you why you're right. Send your questions  to AskTheSophist@hmmweekly.com, and get the answers you want.

SANDWICH RECIPES DEP’T.

WE PRESENT instructions for the assembly of sandwiches from Salads, Sandwiches and Chafing Dish Recipes, Copyright 1916, now in the public domain for the delectation of all, written by Marion Harris Neil, M.C.A., former Cookery Editor, The Ladies’ Home Journal, author of How to Cook in Casserole Dishes, Candies and Bonbons and How to Make Them, Canning, Preserving and Pickling, and The Something-Different Dish.

PICKLE SANDWICHES
4 chopped pickles
3 tablespoonfuls whipped cream
Chopped cooked beef
1 tablespoonful grated fresh horseradish
8 tablespoonfuls mayonnaise or boiled dressing
Buttered bread

Mix together the cream, mayonnaise, or boiled dressing, horseradish, and pickles. Spread buttered bread with this mixture, then with a thin layer of beef, and cover with more dressing and bread. Cut into shapes and serve for supper.

PINEAPPLE SANDWICHES
1 pineapple
Sugar
2 ozs. (1/2 cup) preserved ginger
2 ozs. (1/2 cup) chopped maraschino cherries
White mayonnaise dressing
Bread

Peel and slice the pineapple, add sugar to taste, and allow to stand in a cool place for three hours. The chop fine, add ginger, cherries, and mayonnaise to moisten, and spread between thin squares of bread.

PORK AND OLIVE SANDWICHES
2 boiled pork tenderloins
3/4 pint (1 1/2 cups) stoned olives
2 eggs
1 1/2 gills (3/4 cup) milk
3 tablespoonfuls olive oil
1/3 cupful vinegar
1 teaspoonful mustard
Salt and pepper
Buttered bread
Lettuce leaves

Put the well-cooked tenderloins and the olives through a food-chopper. Break the eggs into a small saucepan, stir in the mustard, add salt and pepper to taste, milk, oil, and vinegar, and stir and cook over a slow fire until the mixture comes to boiling-point. Boil for two minutes and cool. Then add the pork and olives.
Butter slices of bread, then spread the mixture on thick, and put a crisp lettuce leaf between the slices.

If you decide to prepare and enjoy any of these sandwiches, kindly send a picture to us at hmmweekly@substack.com.

HMM WEEKLY IS written by Tom Scocca, editor, and Joe MacStoned, creative director. If you enjoy Hmm Weekly, please let a friend know about it! If you're reading this because someone forwarded it to you, we invite you to sign up for a copy of your own right now. Thanks for reading, and any time you want, email us at hmmweekly@substack.com.